You won't understand why, so try moving to for example, Hampshire, and/or for example, back to Birmingham.
Given the choice of putting up Christmas lights, or going to the pub tonight, I picked the right choice. My life is worth living after all. Amen.
This morning I almost died of shock, or rather, from choking on my own vomit, when on Nick Ferrari's morning slot on LBC Radio, I heard advertisements, in the voice of Boris Johnson (?) for the Spectator magazine. "The Spectator.... Unashamedly elite".
I hope the current ownership of the Spectator is not related to LBC radio. How could LBC sully themselves by carrying such a naffly inappropriately targeted ad?
Spectators, Observers, journalists, are all dangerously voyeuristic. Myself as a Blogger,I hope I shall kill this blog before I stoop to their level, for I already see it happening. Relativity, without having to involve yourself into Einstein's spaced-out mathematics, means voyeurism is worthless and even destructive.
Woman: Simon, you like watching, don't you?
Simon: Yes, Kimberley, you KNOW that....
Woman: Would you like to watch me doing it with another man?
Simon: Yes, wow! I've always wanted to do that! But how? They wouldn't like me watching!
Woman: Aaaaah! But what if I did it with a blind man? Then you could be standing right there, and watching, and he wouldn't know!
Simon: Ooooh! That's disgusting! But you witchy bitch, exciting! It would work, you know, but I'd have to be careful about not wearing aftershave or smelly shampoo scents, I think! Where would you find someone like that?
Woman: HA HAhaha! Don't worry... They don't call me Network Southeast for nothing! I'm American, and you poor English sods are so, so, so naive.
Simon: Who ARE you thinking of?
Woman: Well, a certain man by the name of Blunkett????... (titter)
Simon: WHAT! NO! REALLY! Wow, I'm getting excited just thinking about it!
Woman: Just think of the stories you could tell the little Hoggarts, or better yet, your faithful, brainless Guardian readers
Simon: Ok, I WANT to do this.....Kimberley, you know I LOVE you!
Woman: I love you TOO, Simon, and I want to have your babies!
X left a message on my machine tonight. Fine. Just stay away a little (or maybe a lot) longer, please. I'm alive. You're alive. That's enough to know, and I want no more ....
Back to important things. The Solstice is here. Tomorrow is a celebration. Then comes the Twelve days of Christmas. Christmas shall start on Christmas day, but in my weakness, shall include Christmas Eve. And this one, shall be the most special Christmas ever, because it will entirely be within my soul....
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